When Is Optimization Too Much?
What Are We Running From?
This week something a bit different, but I write about what’s on my mind.
My friend Maureen is an Enneagram type one. When we traveled together to a retreat in Greece last summer I noticed her inclination to comment on what could be improved in every situation we were in. She is not harshly critical like my husband, also a type one, can be at times. She just sees every space and situation as needing a little tweak. We sat by the pool one day on the island of Paros, watching the palm trees sway back and forth in the breeze. She commented, “Those trees could really use trimming underneath their fronds.” We laughed for a long time. But she was serious.
If our situations, our states of being, our bodies, minds, homes, jobs, are never good enough, does that mean we are living in a constant state of dissatisfaction? I think every type one is different, but in the case of Maureen, no. She knows how to relax, have a good time, relish what is, and she is a damn fine real estate agent, a perfect occupation for her type of one I must say.
I’ve only recently come to The Tick Tock. If I wake in the middle of the night, I let it take me away. I’ve been lured by the self-improvement videos, which has resulted in lots of new bottles and bags on my bathroom counter and in my refrigerator. When the Auri mushroom blend arrived yesterday, along with a bottle of biotin gummies shaped like little bunnies for skin, hair and nails, Chris looked at me and I got a bit of an eye roll. I added those to the bag of D3 plus K2 on the counter, along with the turmeric ginger juice in the fridge. Believe it or not I think I’ve shown restraint, which as an Enneagram type 8 doesn’t come easily.
But it’s got me thinking about self-improvement, and when enough is possibly enough. Are we trying to hack death? Perhaps.
“[Biohacking] is a global movement based on the idea that you can change the environment around you and inside of you so you have full control of your own biology,” says Dave Asprey, author of Smarter, Not Harder: The Biohacker’s Guide to Getting the Body and Mind You Want. For most people, “control” means a desire to be better, not just okay, he shared during the 2023 national Biohacking Conference in Orlando, Florida.
Forbes, February 2024
Now don’t get me wrong. The reasons I and so many others are embracing these life hacks, which may also include daily meditation and yoga as well as all these supplements, is that we want to feel better, look better, think better, especially as we age. What could possibly be wrong with that?
We already know that eliminating smoking, drinking alcohol, and eating sugar and processed foods helps us maintain our health. But this new movement of self-improvement takes the process of living to a process of optimization.
Despite his poor dating habits, I’ve been on the Huberman train for a long time. His deep dives are well researched and executed, and I’ve learned about topics I never would have considered, like the gut brain connection, and the importance of light. But it does feel like as a culture right now, we have taken the optimization of the body a little too far, not because improving our physical bodies is wrong, but because what all the focus on our biology and the extension of life takes us away from: a psychic and spiritual acknowledgement of the cycle of life, of the limitations of the temporal, of death itself.
Our optimization culture’s focus on time, on the 1440 minutes we get each day and how to make the most out of them may also be distracting us. How many of you are like me, and have a tight hold on our daily plans and feel guilty if we get off track? I use a habit tracker where I set goals for each week and then fill in with a red, yellow or green marker how I did. Did I exercise, eat well, sleep enough? Lots of green circles mean I’m doing well. The yellows and reds make me feel a little bad, but each day is a new opportunity, right?
As an Enneagram type 8 I can run myself ragged. My friend Lynn Roulo, an Enneagram expert and Kundalini practitioner, developed krias for each of the twenty-seven Enneagram sub-types, and for me, a social eight, my kria is all about self-care. I guess yoga is one of the few practices I see which can include a kind of optimization, but is focused on spirit as well.
I should probably turn off Tick Tock and do yoga Nidra when I wake up in the middle of the night. I don't need more gummies on the counter. But there's also something comforting about clips from Judge Judy and Real Housewives at 3am, and knowing that while I'm up there's this whole world awake and ready to optimize me if I let it. Or I can just watch trash TV clips and be unoptimized (is that a word?). That, my friends, is ok.
On another note, see below.
Offerings
I’m excited to announce my friend and colleague Laurie Blackwell and I are getting together to host a Summer Solstice Tarot Party on Thursday, June 20th at 5pm PST. There will be a guide book, discussion about summer tarot cards, and the opportunity to do a summer solstice spread with us. The price is $10 and sign up is at the link below. It will be recorded.
https://www.laurieblackwell.com/sumsoltarpar