Beginning is the Willingness to be The Fool
this, the first of my tarot musings
Entering
Two weeks ago I was the subject of a self-induced photo shoot. Starting a new project like this requires some vulnerability and willingness to be seen. Like a lot of people I don’t think I am photogenic. I look at all my imperfections and judge myself for my own humanity. I open this newsletter with perhaps the least scary photo from the shoot but one which makes sense to show you right now. I’m walking in the forest both literally and metaphorically, uncovering a new set of ideas, ones I don’t even know yet, and I’m willing to show a different side of who I am. A note that this shot was taken right after a run in with stinging nettles and a yellow jacket sting to my foot, which resulted in crazy itching all over my body for a few hours. Ah, the serenity of nature.
The Fool’s Journey
My friend Chris says there are three kinds of people: starters, fixers, and finishers. I like this idea, and most people know immediately which camp they belong to. I am a starter with every fiber of my being. I love beginnings and newness, the excitement of a blank journal, Mondays, the new year. I love beginning projects and putting together plans. I am a doer, an enneagram eight, a Leo. But as I begin this newsletter, its inaugural issue, I realize that when one is a starter, there is an inherent willingness to be the The Fool. So The Fool is where we will begin.
Collage of Tarot Fools by Phylemeana lili Desy
Whether we think of the mythical Fool’s journey, or just recognize that in tarot, with the major arcana, we begin with zero and move through the next twenty-one cards to end with the World, The Fool can represent both childish innocence AND the willingness to take risks. Look at Pamela Coleman Smith’s depiction of the young man looking up at the sky as he stands at the edge of a cliff.
As a forever student, I believe the cliche that the more educated you become, the more you realize what you don’t know. Though I have studied the tarot and enneagram for years, I relish my unknowing, the magic that happens when I come upon something new, fuse ideas together to become something different, the alchemy of concepts.
My teacher Laurie Blackwell, early on, gave me the cyclical image of the twenty-two major arcana, the idea that we finish a cycle and begin the next, over and over throughout our lives. Not only that but we may be at different points in the soul’s cycles at the same time. So as I am what we might call a “mature” woman, I am perhaps in the middle of my own natural life cycle, experiencing the Moon perhaps or maybe even the Wheel of Fortune. But when it comes to this process, project, time in my life with the tarot specifically, I begin my own fool’s journey. And I welcome you to come along.
What this newsletter will include, but not exclusively:
thoughts on the tarot and enneagram which ask to be written
recommendations based upon what I am reading and listening to now, both tarot and not tarot related
reminders of my current offerings (very excited to share a class I am co-teaching with Laurie Blackwood on 9/18)
answers to tarot questions which may come my way and seem like they would be useful to a larger audience.
interviews with people in the tarot world whom I find interesting and inspiring.
What I’m reading this week:
I read a lot outside of the realm of enneagram and tarot.
Consolations David Whyte
https://bookshop.org/books/consolations-the-solace-nourishment-and-underlying-meaning-of-everyday-words/9781932887341
Every page of this book is damn beautiful. I keep it close at hand always.
Art of Memoir Mary Karr
https://bookshop.org/books/the-art-of-memoir-9780062223074/9780062223074
“…there is a psychic cost for lopping yourself off from the past: it may continue to tug on you without your being aware of it.”
Sex Object Jessica Valenti
https://bookshop.org/books/sex-object-a-memoir/9780062435095
Body Work Melissa Febos
https://bookshop.org/books/body-work-the-radical-power-of-personal-narrative/9781646220854
Both of these books reminded me of what it was like to be a young woman growing up in NYC. It was really helpful to know others had jarringly similar experiences as me.
Who is guiding me right now:
Ray of Light Community
a beautiful group of creative women who support each other in all kinds of good ways
https://www.tammisalas.com/community
Laurie Blackwell @loneblackbird www.laurieblackwell.com
tarot mentor extraordinaire, what she has given me cannot be described in words, just my heart
Jessica Dore @thejessicadore
my other tarot mentor, one of the smartest people I’ve had the honor to spend time with. Tarot for Change is one of the top five tarot books I would recommend to anyone wanting insight on the tarot.
Kim Krans
All four decks in her series offer so much insight and light. They continue to be an inspiration.
Erin Jean Warde erinjeanwarde.com
my priest, my friend, my coach, my biggest cheerleader
ALWAYS my own intuition. As an enneagram 8, I tend to lead with my gut.
You can always find me and my offerings at www.hannamcelroy.com
You can always directly e mail me at hanna@hannamcelroy.com
I would love to hear from you
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I will forever be your biggest cheerleader! I’m honored to be mentioned but I don’t deserve it. This is about you -- and I’m so thrilled to be along for the journey! You are a gifted teacher of wisdom & I am blessed by you! Excited to learn from you here, too. 💛